Ten Ways to Annoy the Person in the Next Toilet

1. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a melon into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.

2. Fill up a large flask with Lucozade. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, “Whoa! Easy big boy!”

3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, “Whoops, could you kick that back over here please”?

5. Say, “C’mon Mr. Happy!! Don’t fall asleep on me!!”

6. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall where the person in the next stall can see it.

7. Say, “Oh my, this water’s cold!”

8. Say, “Hmm, I’ve never seen that colour before.”

9. Say, “Interesting, more floaters than sinkers.”

10. Drop a marble and say, “Oh noooo, my glass eye!!”