Archive | Outdoors and Camping
One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish. About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family.
"You aren’t going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman, "you should be working rather than lying on the beach!"
The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?"
"Well, you could get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman’s answer.
"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling.
The businessman replied, "You could make money and be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!"
"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again.
The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman’s questions. "You could buy a bigger boat and hire some people to work for you!" he said.
"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman.
The businessman was getting angry. "Don’t you understand? You could build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!"
Once again the fisherman asked, "And then what will my reward be?"
The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, "Don’t you understand that you could become so rich that you will never have to work again! You could spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won’t have a care in the world!"
The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I’m doing right now?"
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, “when did you bag him?”
The host said, “that was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife.”
“What’s he stuffed with,” asked the visiting hunter.
The Colorado State Wildlife Division is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen and golfers to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the Dillon, Breckenridge and Keystone areas. They advise people to wear noise producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert the bears but not startle them unexpectedly. They also advise the carrying of pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear.
It is also a good idea to watch out for “fresh signs” of bear activity. People should make sure they can recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear droppings. Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berries and possibly squirrel fur. Grizzly bear droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper spray.
Two moose hunters from Texas are flown into a remote lake in Alaska. They have a good hunt and both manage to get a large moose. When the plane returns to pick them up, the pilot looks at the animals and says, “This little plane won’t lift all of us, the equipment, and both of those animals. You’ll have to leave one. We’d never make it over the trees on the take off.”
“That’s baloney!” says one of the hunters.
“Yeah,” the other agrees, “you’re just chicken. We came out here last year and got two moose and that pilot had some guts! He wasn’t afraid to take off!”
“Yeah”, said the first hunter, “and his plane wasn’t any bigger than yours!”
The pilot got angry, and said, “Hell, if he did it, then I can do it! I can fly as well as anybody!”
They loaded up, taxied at full throttle, and the plane almost made it, but didn’t have the lift to clear the trees at the end of the lake. It clipped the tops, then flipped, then broke up,scattering the baggage, animal carcasses, and passengers all through the brush. Still alive, but hurt and dazed, the pilot sat up, shook his head to clear it, and said, “Where are we?”
One of the hunters rolled out from being thrown into a bush, looked around and said, “I’d say… About a hundred yards further than last year.”