Funny label instructions on consumer goods

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Actual label instructions on consumer goods:

  1. On Sears hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.
  2. On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
  3. On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.
  4. Some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.
  5. On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head.
  6. On Tesco’s Tiramisu desert: Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
  7. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.
  8. On packaging for a Rowenta Iron: Do not iron clothes on body.
  9. On Boot’s Children’s Cough Medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery.
  10. On Nytol (a sleep aid): Warning: may cause drowsiness.
  11. On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning. Keep out of children.
  12. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only.
  13. On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.
  14. On Sainsbury’s Peanuts Warning: contains nuts.
  15. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
  16. On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
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