A golf club walks into a bar and orders a beer, but the bartender refuses to serve him. “Why not?” asks the golf club. “You’ll be driving later.”
A $5 note walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Get out! This is a singles bar.”
A book walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Please, no stories!”
A number 12 walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a pint of beer. “Sorry, I can’t serve you,” says the bartender. “Why not?” asks the number 12 angrily. “You’re under 18,” replies the bartender.
A soccer ball walks into a bar. The bartender kicks him out.
Bacon and eggs walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
A brain walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer. The bartender says, “I’m not serving you, you’re out of your skull!”
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Rabbi, and a priest walk into a bar and the bartender says, “What is this? Some kind of joke?”
A man walks into a bar with jumper leads. The bartender says, “You can come in, but don’t start anything!”
A pickle walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you’re a pickle! What are you doing here?” The pickle says, “Well, for starters, I’m
celebrating the fact that I can walk.”
Two dyslexics walk into a bra…