If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months, and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat up one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it.)
If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now, that’s more like it.)
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out of the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
On average, people fear spiders more they they do death.
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight, and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of….? Did the government pay for this research?)
Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew? Who cares? Did the government pay for this too?)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It’s like a human jumping the length of a football field.
A cockroach will live 9 days without its head before it starves to death.
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while it’s head is attached to its body. The female initiates reproductive sex by ripping the male’s head off. (Hi, honey. I’m home. What the…?)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, jeez!)
Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.
An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.)
Starfish don’t have brains. (I know some people like this too.)
You asked for it and Funny Grins delivers. Questions and Answers from those lovable but scary creatures – Bears!
Q: What kind of money to polo bears use?
A: Ice lolly!
Q: Have you ever hunted bear?
A: No, but I’ve been shooting in my shorts!
Q: How do you start a teddy bear race?
A: Ready, teddy, go!
Q: What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A: A bear faced lyre!
Q: Why do bears have fur coats?
A: Because they’d look stupid in anoraks!
Q: What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig?
A: A teddy boar!
Q: What should you call a bald teddy?
A: Fred bear!
Q: What animal do you look like when you get into the bath?
A: A little bear!
Q: What’s yellow, comes from Peru, and is completely unknown?
A: Waterloo Bear, Paddington Bear’s forgotten cousin!
Q: What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
A: Winnie the Pooh!
Q: How do you hire a teddy bear?
A: Put him on stilts!
Q: What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle?
A: A polo bear!
Q: Why do polo bears like bald men?
A: Because they have a great, white, bear place!
Q: What do polo bears have for lunch?
A: Ice burger!
Q: What’s a teddy bears favorite pasta?
Q: What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
A: They both have ‘the’ as their middle names!
Q: Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet?
A: It lives on ice!
Q: Why shouldn’t you take a bear to the zoo?
A: Because they’d rather go to the cinema!
Q: What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Q: Why was the little bear so spoiled?
A: Because its mother panda’d to its every whim!