The crazy things that walk into a bar

A golf club walks into a bar and orders a beer, but the bartender refuses to serve him.  “Why not?” asks the golf club.  “You’ll be driving later.”

A $5 note walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Get out! This is a singles bar.”

A book walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Please, no stories!”

A number 12 walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a pint of beer. “Sorry, I can’t serve you,” says the bartender.  “Why not?” asks the number 12 angrily.  “You’re under 18,” replies the bartender.

A soccer ball walks into a bar.  The bartender kicks him out.

Bacon and eggs walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”

A brain walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer. The bartender says, “I’m not serving you, you’re out of your skull!”

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Rabbi, and a priest walk into a bar and the bartender says, “What is this? Some kind of joke?”

A man walks into a bar with jumper leads.  The bartender says, “You can come in, but don’t start anything!”

A pickle walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you’re a pickle! What are you doing here?”  The pickle says, “Well, for starters, I’m
celebrating the fact that I can walk.”

Two dyslexics walk into a bra…