I met a man once named Job,
Who made an earring from a glob.
Now, isn’t that queer?
A glob on his ear?
He now has a twenty-foot lob.
The once was a man with a fro
who went by the name of Moe.
One dark night
He forgot his light,
And what’d ya know, he stubs his toe!
There once was a man named Joe
Who had very crusty toes
He had corns and bunions
That smelled like onions
And that’s how the story goes
There was a young man from Lenore,
Whose mouth was as wide as a door.
While attempting to grin,
He slipped and fell in,
And laid inside out on the floor.
To manage to keep up a brain,
It’s no easy job, it is plain;
That’s why a great many
Don’t ever use any,
Thus avoiding the care and the strain.
A lawyer finds out he has a brain tumor, and it’s inoperable – in fact, it’s so large, they have to do a brain transplant.
His doctor gives him a choice of available brains – there’s a jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, a jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an ounce, and a jar of lawyer brains for the princely sum of $800 an ounce.
The outraged lawyer says, “This is a ripoff – how come the lawyer brains are so damned expensive?”
The doctor replies, “Do you know how many lawyers it takes to get an ounce of brains?”