The Nerd with the Fairy Princess Frog

An computer programmer is walking along the road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.”  He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I’ll spend the week with you.” The computer programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I’ll stay with you for a week and be your girlfriend.”   Again the computer programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Desperately, the frog asked, “What is the matter?   I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, that I’ll stay with you for a week and be your girlfriend.  Why won’t you kiss me?”

The computer programmer said, “Look, I’m an computer programmer.  I don’t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog?  Now that’s cool.”

Three men and the Genie

Three men – a project manager, a software engineer, and a hardware engineer – are in Miami beach for a two-week period helping out on a project.  About midweek, they decide to walk up and down the beach during their lunch hour.  Halfway up the beach, they stumble upon a lamp.  As they rub the lamp, a genie appears and says, “Normally I would grant you three wishes, but since there are 3 of you, I will grant you each one wish.”

The hardware engineer goes first.  “I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas, with no money worries and surrounded by beautiful women who worship me.”  The genie grants him his wish and sends him on off to St. Thomas.

The software engineer is next.  “I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean, with no money worries and surrounded by beautiful women who worship me.”  The genie grants him his wish and sends him off to the Mediterranean.

Last, but not least, it’s the project manager’s turn. “And what would your wish be?” asked the genie.

“I want them both back after lunch” replied the project manager.