I don’t buy that excuse for you being late

Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time this month and found the boss waiting for him at his desk.

“What’s the story this time, Jones?” the boss asked while dripping sarcasm. “Let’s hear a good excuse for a change.”

Jones sighed, “Everything went wrong this morning, Boss.  The wife decided to drive me to the station.  She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river.  I ran out to the airport, got a ride on Mr. Thompson’s helicopter, landed on top of Radio City Music Hall, and was carried here piggyback by one of the Rockette dancers.”

“You’ll have to do better than that, Jones,” said the boss, obviously disappointed. “No woman can get ready in ten minutes.”