guns
Zoo vet mistakes man in gorilla suit for real thing – shoots with tranquilizer gun
Staff at the Loro Parque Zoo were taking part in a drill designed to ensure proper emergency procedures were in place in case one of the gorillas escaped its enclosure. But the zoo vet had not been informed of the training exercise. He spotted the employee wearing a gorilla suit and sprang into action shooting the man in the leg with a tranquilizer gun designed for a 400 lb gorilla. The costumed employee, before passing out, recognized the mistake and began fleeing while tearing off the costume. According to La Opinion de Tenerife, when the man was located he was wearing nothing but his underwear.
The injured man was taken to the University Hospital of the Canary islands where he recovered and is now in good condition.
Affair drives blonde to murder
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is seeing another woman. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun.
The next day she comes home to find her husband sitting in the living room with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head, her finger shaking on the trigger of the gun. The husband jumps out of bed, runs to her, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.
Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ”Shut up…you’re next!”
Sprinkle Gunpowder on your Cornflakes
A man once counselled his son that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his Cornflakes every morning. The son did this religiously, and he lived to the age of 93. When he died, he left 14 children, 28 grandchildren, 35 great-grand children, and a 15 foot hole in the wall of the crematorium.