An abusive boss at a clothing shop in Rochester, New York found his shop abandoned during Back to School season after all of his employees bailed out on him– but not before leaving this funny note taped to the front of the store.
The note read:
“Dear Jamie: Since you decided to say ‘cancer is not an excuse’ and think it’s OK to swear at your employees like you do ALL the time… WE QUIT. THIS is why you can’t keep a store manager longer than a year. YOU ABUSE your [role] and staff. “Enjoy the fact that you lost a store manager, co-manager and key holder in the middle of Back to School. Think next time before you treat people the way you do.”
A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”
The man below says: “Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude.”
“You must be an engineer” says the balloonist.
“I am” replies the man. “How did you know.”
“Well” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost.”
The man below says “You must be a manager.”
“I am” replies the balloonist, “but how did you know?”
“Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault.”
It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale and some clever advertising in the local paper were the main reason for the long line that formed by 6:30 in the morning in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses.
On the man’s second attempt to reach the door of the store, he was punched square in the jaw, shoved around a bit, and then thrown to the end of the line again. As he got up for the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line, “That does it! If I get hit one more time, I won’t open the store!”