Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single.
One day, the millionaire decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces, “My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars, or my daughter, to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!”
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash in the pool. The guy in the pool was swimming with all his might, and the crowd began to cheer him on. Finally, he made it to the other side of the pool unharmed.
The millionaire was impressed. He said, “That was incredible! Fantastic! I didn’t think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain. Do you want my daughter or the one million dollars?”
The guy catches his breath, then says, “Listen, I don’t want your money! And I don’t want your daughter! I want the jerk who pushed me in the pool!”
While sports fishing just off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, “Are there any gators around here?”
“Naw,” the man hollered back, “They ain’t been around for years!”
Feeling safe the tourist started swimming leisurely towards the shore. About halfway there, he asked the beachcomber who was observing him from shore. “How did you get rid of the gators?”
“We didn’t do anything,” the man responded.
“Wow,” saaid the tourist. “You mean they just stopped coming around?”
“No,” the beachcomber responded, “The sharks got ’em.